I am the first to admit I am not the biggest football fan. After the allocated 90 minutes of play and no overall winner, I blurted out “oh! they will go into overtime!” My child's eyes rolled, and my family corrected me to 'EXTRA TIME!' .

Of course, we all had to watch the match on Sunday the 11th July 2021. England versus Italy; it was a show of loyalty, if nothing else.

As disappointed as we all were, the after-match commentary was fascinating for a novice to hear. Modern technology allows the beautiful game to be monitored in a very exact way. The post-match data showed Italy was the stronger side; they held onto the ball sixty-sixty percent of the time compared to England’s thirty-four percent. Italy also had twice as many accurate passes. It was clear to see that these were powerful opponents!

We were on home ground, with a predominantly home crowd providing a roaring support. The nation’s emotions were fully behind the players. As national footballing treasure, Gary Linneker, said: the England team did their best against the “football giants” of Italy.

As exciting as the match was, the part of me that is always thinking about education and learning couldn’t help but think about aspirations and emotions, and the role they play in our lives.

Next is the World Cup

The aspirations of a nation will have another chance when England goes for the World cup next year. But this is not about aspirations—it is about the hard facts revealed by the data; this means next time the England team can get the formulae correct, we can all wear the famous Gareth Southgate waistcoats to celebrate. .

What is an aspiration?

What is an aspiration? An aspiration is an idea and thought, as well as a hope or goal for the future. It is something we can work towards incrementally and take the steps needed to have the desired outcome. Returning to the example of football: to achieve their aspiration of winning the match, they need to achieve certain steps. First, of course, they need to take possession of the ball. The more often they have the ball, the more opportunities they have to score. We can measure the outcome by working with these facts and making sure the team increases their chances next time.

This way of thinking is rational thought at play. It is a logical and systematic way of achieving aspirations, but when emotions are high, it can be very difficult to see how to work towards these goals in the right way. Gareth and the England team had to focus rationally on achieving their goals for more than 2 hours, despite the huge emotions they must have been feeling at the time. It is not an easy task for anyone, so you can imagine how emotions can affect the processes of children with special needs.

Children and their desired outcomes

For example, children who are over-emotional are very distant from the rational understanding of how to work towards goals, or how the desired outcome can be reached. They often feel an injustice but don't understand why. Many children with special needs rely on emotions in place of clear, rational thoughts. I work with many dyspraxic children who dream of playing football with their peers, or even just playing with balls to any level of success. Of course, they can then feel disheartened when their efforts are not rewarded.

Using a special technique called Bal-A-Vis-X, they can learn to catch and throw with success. While they can get upset very easily, I teach parents to use their child's highly emotional brain to help them turn their thinking around. Feeling good can be measured using smiley-faced stickers to reward their effort, and celebrate even small successes, associating that achievement with positive emotions.

Naturally, the more stickers children see for their effort, the happier they feel, and the more effort they apply. This effort, coupled with the correct tools of using Bal-A-Vis-X, leads to eventual success.

See my recent blog about habits if you want to learn more about how celebrate successes can help both children and adults achieve their goals!

Why do children with special needs get more emotional?

Children need good working memory to remember they were successful. This cognitive skill is deficient in many children with special needs. They forget they are successful, so the concrete sticker chart helps with their working memory deficit. Feeling good becomes a habit associated with that activity and rewarded with the ability to catch and throw.

It is a long journey on the road to breaking negative emotions, but we can do it with the right tools and counting how many successes the child has had each time. The data will not be as exact as any post-football match data, but they are hard facts that move the child closer to their aspirations of success.

If you are interested in learning more about how these specialist activities could help your child, please get in touch.

Dyslexia? Dyspraxia? ADHD? ASD? Speech & Language? Developmental Delay? Anxiety?

Is every school day a struggle? As a parent, you may feel exhausted and on this journey alone. Each year you see the gap getting wider. You need to do something - change the approach, help your child learn for themselves, find a way to turn this around - to help while you can - do this NOW. the first step is free.